either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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