This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
