Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
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she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
just found out that she named her cat after me.
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I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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