I wish I only lived at night.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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