how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
