Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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