go do what you do best...puke behind churches
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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