after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize