Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
we're chasing vodka with high fives
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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