Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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