Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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