Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
