Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
