considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
