K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
