Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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