It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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