I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize