On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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