you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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