38 yer olds are good kisserssss
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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