So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
