a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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