I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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