first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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