fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
