saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Your penis caused this!
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