In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
