Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I have feelings that need drinking.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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