at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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