Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize