i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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