There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
