I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize