i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
True strength comes from lack of pants
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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