Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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