I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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