also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize