her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
