i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
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he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
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The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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