He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
