Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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