a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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