I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
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