I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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