there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
