We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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