So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
