Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
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Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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