I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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