There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
